Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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