My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize