come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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