THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
this will be a night to untag.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
