I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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