Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
