ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Randomize
