I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
