My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize
