we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
