his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
