the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
