I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
