Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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