Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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