Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
