That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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