how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
