if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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