I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
being pregnant is like rehab
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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