epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize