Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Randomize
