dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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