As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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