He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
