So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
You can't motorboat a personality
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
