She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
