i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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