So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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