Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I am mentally ready for anal.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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