You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
