all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
