We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Randomize
