end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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