Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
