We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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