I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
