Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
