when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Enjoy the penises
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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