take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
What a dumb baby whore.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
