singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Be still, my beating vagina.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize