just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize
