put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
