My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm having to shit out rocks
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