hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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