i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
