Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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