honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
