I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
