Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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